Simple Prayer Tips for Those Who Don't Know Where to Start
Prayer 101: Inspiring Christians To Have A Closer Relationship With God Through Prayer
3/31/20266 min read
What is prayer? Simply put, prayer is the act of talking with God.
Rather, you are new to the faith or you've been a Christian for a long time, prayer is important. It is one of the ways that we develop and grow a personal relationship with him.
Some of you might feel intimidated to pray because you're confused about where to start. Don't worry. You're not alone. I used to feel this same way.
Even though I grew up in the church, I was never taught how to have a genuine conversation with the Lord. As kids, my sister and I did a lot of reciting. We recited a child’s prayer before each meal. Also, we said the Lord’s Prayer or the “Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep” prayer before we went to sleep. As a teen, I watched others pray in prayer circles and tried to mimic them. Also, I would on rare occasions beg God for help during times of a crisis. You know, how we do! We are good for treating God like he is Santa Claus or a genie in a bottle.
All of the reciting, mimicking, and even the begging started to feel religious and traditional as I got older. If anything, it made my prayers feel robotic instead of genuine and personal.
I did not learn how to pray until my early twenties. My fast-paced life consisted of being a full-time college student, a part-time bank teller at Wells Fargo, and an active church member. Also, I was a single woman who was living on her own. During this time, the desire to have a closer relationship with God began to form. I wanted to develop a true prayer life, but I did not know where to start.
At the beginning of 2012, I felt God tugging on my heart to take a break (fast) from Facebook for a month. This was a huge deal for me! Back then, I was very addicted to Facebook. Never had I done such a thing. Did God know what He was asking me to do? This would be a huge sacrifice for me. Amazingly, God confirmed that he was leading me to take a break within the next few days. I remember listening to a talk on a Christian radio station while I was at the drive-thru of a fast-food restaurant. I was shocked because the man was talking about taking breaks from social media. At that moment, I decided to let go of my will and do what God wanted me to do.
During this time, the death of Trayvon Martin occurred. Facebook was my main source for getting news, so I did not know much about the details of the events. However, I would find out once I got back on social media.
Surprisingly, this one-month challenge ended up being stretched out to four months, because I was enjoying spending time in God's presence. My prayer life really began to grow. It was in my one-bedroom apartment that I discovered how to communicate with God.
Now, I desire to share what I learned and for you to be encouraged after reading this post. Again, it's important that every Christian have a prayer life. It's how we stay in communication with God. May the simple tips below help you get started.
Find a Quiet Place
One thing that I've learned over the past decade of developing my prayer life is that it is hard to pray surrounded by noise and distractions. These can come from your kids, your spouse, television, phones, your cat, your dog, etc. You can easily lose focus. Distractions can even encourage you to stop prematurely. To prevent this, find a place and time where you can put all of your undivided attention towards prayer. Turn off or silence your phone, and you'll have the perfect setting to pray.
Have the Right Posture
Making sure that you are in the right position to pray is key. What I'm saying here is to have the right attitude before you even say a word. Go into prayer with confidence, thankfulness, and honesty. I discuss these things deeper in my post, The Right Posture for Prayer.
Forget a Formula
Just like this post, there are many sources out there that give guidance on how to pray. It's essential to know how, but I personally don't believe that Christians must pray in a certain order. Yes, it's good to form a habit, but it could eventually make your prayers robotic or stagnant.
Go Beyond Reciting Prayers
There are many great prayers that you can recite. Jesus even gave us a prayer to model in the book of Matthew Chapter 6. This one is known as the Lord's Prayer. This prayer shows us how to thank God, repent and ask for forgiveness, and tell God our needs. Reciting prayers is a good start. I did it for a long time. It's easy, and some of you are probably doing this right now. But if you want to have a true prayer life, go beyond reciting. Talk to God with your own words. Be authentic and genuine with what you're saying. This leads me to my next point.
Rip up the script.
You don't have to pray how you've heard others pray. They might have sounded super spiritual. They may have impressed you. However, you don't have to be fancy with your words. (I'm laughing. I can only imagine God rolling his eyes with this one!) Forget the "thy and thous". Prayer doesn't have to sound Shakespearean. Be authentic. God knows who you are. He knows your personality and everything. Speak as you would normally speak.
Talk to Him Like a Friend
I feel that one of the biggest reasons why we struggle to pray to God is because we see him in the wrong perspective. For me, I used to view God as this hard taskmaster who was distant and not really concerned about every little thing going on in my life. Maybe, that's how some of you see him. If so, having this wrong idea of who he really makes it complicated to see God as your friend. We have to get rid of our wrong assumptions of God and know him as the loving, intimate God who cares about the details of our lives. He wants to spend and enjoy time with us just like a friend. If you're struggling in this area, turn to the Bible to find out who God is. The more you read about him, the more you'll know him.
Confess Your Sins and Repent
Confession: I had originally planned to keep this tip out because I felt that this point was more for those who already have a prayer life. Also, I did not want it to stop you from giving prayer a try. However; I felt God leading me to keep it.
Sin is a great wall that separates us from God. Knowing that we have messed up can make it difficult for us to pray. We may feel so unworthy and ashamed that we shy away from prayer completely. Not only this but hiding sin in our hearts can actually hinder our prayers. Psalms 66:18 states "If I regard iniquity in my heart, the Lord will not hear me" (King James Bible).
Not confessing our sins before God, can and will stop your prayers from getting through to God. Don't be discouraged. I have good news for you. God's word says, "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness" (1 John 1:9 NIV).
This scripture gives us confidence that God will forgive us when we confess our sins. With this in mind, we are free to go before Him without the heavy guilt and shame. We can ask him anything according to his will and know that he hears us.
Express Your Heart
You might be thinking that God won't understand your feelings of frustration, doubt, sadness, or hurt. However; that is far from the truth. Hebrews 4:15 says "For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are--yet he did not sin"(NIV). He is a God who can relate because he lived on this earth and experienced all kinds of hatred, betrayals, and sorrows.
With prayer, there's freedom in knowing that you can speak to God about anything you want. I mean, even though he's all-knowing, he desires for us to talk to him about everything.
I learned this while I was growing in my personal walk with Jesus Christ and praying more. It was a great way for me to vent. I've spoken to God about my desire and struggle to remain a virgin years before I got married, I've expressed my frustrations about being miserable at a job, and I've sought him for direction countless times as a first-time author. Expressing myself helped me to release my burdens to God and trust that he would make a way in those areas.
Final Encouragement
I pray that these tips blessed you today and helped you feel more comfortable to begin praying. Don't worry if you still find yourself struggling the first few times. It's all about starting. As Christians, it's all about growing closer to God. The more you pray, the closer you'll feel to him and the more you'll get to know him. Be blessed, and feel free to share this with others you know who could benefit from it.
Resources:
https://www.crosswalk.com/faith/prayer/is-now-i-lay-me-down-to-sleep-biblical.html
https://www.crosswalk.com/faith/bible-study/5-powerful-prayers-from-scripture.html
https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew+6%3A+9-15&version=KJV
https://www.crosswalk.com/faith/prayer/the-lords-prayer-be-encouraged-and-strengthened.html
https://biblehub.com/psalms/66-18.htm